In almost every culture in the world, humans have sex for pleasure, procreation or a mix of both. However, no matter the reason for having sex, it should never be treated as a race towards the finish line of ecstasy. In fact, studies have shown that this is the exact opposite of how sex is meant to be. In short, foreplay is important.
In most cases, men are the guiltiest, since the height of pleasure during sex for a man is the point of ejaculation. This means many would simply rush everything else and go all out for the honey point. While there is nothing wrong with a quickie, science and cultures everywhere seem to agree on one thing — the best sex is one that isn’t rushed.
Just like in most other cultures, foreplay was an important part of sex in ancient Arabian society. Typically, sex isn’t meant to be rushed. Instead, a man is expected to take his time to make his woman ready for sex before proceeding with intercourse. Touch, kisses and caresses were a recognized and important part of lovemaking among Arab men and women.
Importance of Kissing in ancient Arabian societies
In emphasizing the importance of foreplay before sex, Cheikh Nefzaoui’s “The Perfumed Garden” mentions some important points worthy of note about kissing. In fact, it is believed that sexual intercourse isn’t completely pleasurable if the lovers don’t kiss each other. Kissing is believed to be one of the most erotic and powerful stimulants to lovemaking.
Kissing is believed to be an integral part of sex and the Arabs took it quite serious even to the extent of recommending specific tips and tricks about kissing correctly. A deep kiss on humid lips accompanied by suction of the lips and tongue is believed to be the best form of kissing.
More specifically, it is believed that sucking the tongue provokes the flow of fresh saliva in the mouth which is quite recommended for the enjoyment and pleasure of both lovers. In fact, while this might be an over-exaggerated fact, the Arabs believed that the fresh saliva secreted in the act of kissing a lover is fresh, sweet and quite intoxicating and arousing.
Ancient Arabs believed that a superficial kiss to the lips isn’t quite as arousing as a deep sonorous kiss. Hence the goal is to make it as deep as possible with the lips and tongues of both lovers fully engaged in the act.
A Humid kiss is better than hurried coitus
This is a verse from an ancient Arabian text which further emphasizes just how important taking the time to get a partner ready for sexual intercourse is. It is believed that a man who wants to enjoy optimum pleasure during intercourse must take his time to ensure that his woman is in the right mood, through foreplay which includes touches, kisses, and caresses.
In fact, he is not expected to proceed with penetrative sex until he has her swooning with lust with her vagina well lubricated and ready for him.
Moreover, it is believed that foreplay isn’t only important for pleasure, but also for procreation as well. The ancient Arabs believed that when a woman is made ready for sex through foreplay, her womb is stretched and receptive which further increases the possibility of fertilization.
However, like every rule concerning sexual intercourse, there are exemptions.
It is believed that there are women who do not find satisfaction during sex unless it is penetrative. For such women, foreplay isn’t quite as important as vaginal penetration itself. But the case can also be said to be true in the opposite as well. There are also a good number of women who do not enjoy vaginal penetration as much as other forms of stimulation.
In fact, studies have shown that quite a good number of woman are more likely to reach orgasm through clitoral stimulation rather than mere penetration. Thus it is important that every lover understands each other to ensure that sex is enjoyed to the maximum.
There’s a catch though
While ancient Arabian culture strongly supports foreplay, it is believed that all forms of kisses, caresses and sexual body contacts are intended for sexual intercourse alone and should only be done in the context of lovemaking. While it is unclear why the Arabs had the “no smooching without sex” rule, it most likely had a moral basis.
Also, there seems to be a belief that arousal without satisfaction is unhealthy since ancient Arabs likened sexual passion to a raging fire that can only be quenched by ejaculation. Thus performing the act without the intention of having penetrative sex, which is a fairly common practice today in many cultures, was not common in Ancient Arabian civilization.
What about men?
It comes as no surprise that the rules about foreplay are directed mainly at what men should do to get the woman prepped for sex. This isn’t only because Arabian society was mostly patriarchal. In fact, there are reasons to believe that such rules were made because women would have otherwise been left unsatisfied by men, owing to their propensity to hurry through sex, without consideration for their partner.
Since men are more likely to attain an orgasm no matter the quality of sex, most cultures tend to give instructions about the things men should do to prolong the act of lovemaking, which includes foreplay.
We know for a fact today that foreplay helps both men and women. For example, anxiety is one of the factors that may affect performance and cause issues like erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation. Through foreplay, a man can take his time to get ready and calm his nerves while also getting his lover in the mood.